New Year's Reflections

The beginning of a new year and this new year corresponds to the beginning of a new season of my life.

2004 brought into existence AWE, brought to a close my time on staff at the Florence Vineyard; a number of significant changes, but not nearly as large as the changes I can already see 2005 is going to bring.

2005 will mark the launch of Marketplace Earth, a move from the rural areas of Burlington to the almost urban areas of Ft. Thomas, but the most radical change without a doubt will be the start of our community-based church, where, for the first time, our family will intentionally move to live life in community with other believers and call it “church”.

One of the questions I’m asking myself today is what kind of a person do I need to be this year in order to take these steps forward? Are there practices missing from my life, old habits that need to die and new habits that need to be formed? I’ve learned that a person with my personality (a “P” from the Myers-Briggs) means it’s better for me to begin a change by examining and changing my convictions instead of starting with outward behavior modification (like making new year’s resolutions). Here are some changes I'm working on making...

1. Blogging - The first change I’m making is this decision to blog. I wrestled with the idea of a blog for a long time. I’m very reserved and having my internal life exposed in this way feels too vulnerable. But what do I really have to lose? What if the sharing of my thoughts and feelings help those who I love understand me and interact with my ideas. So what if someone wants to take advantage of this vulnerability, what can they really do?

2. My physical body – When I discovered my cholesterol was very high it really changed the way I thought about eating and exercise. I need to take the next step in this area this year but I’m not sure how to begin. I enjoy going to the gym and working-out on occasion but when life gets busy that habit falls away without a second thought. I think joining an organized sport once we move to Ft. Thomas may help. They’re starting dodge ball at the Florence Vineyard which is an awesome idea but I won’t be living near the church for long.

3. Community Living – When we move to Ft. Thomas I’ll be living in community with people who live in houses within walking distance. This is sure to change our lifestyle as a family in many ways that are difficult for me to predict. What can I do to prepare for such a transition? April and I are both introverts and retreat from people to gain energy but we also want people to be much closer and interconnected to our family. It’s going to be a delicate balance. I’m most excited about how this will draw me closer to Christ.

4. Prayer – Perhaps the change I long for more than anything is for my prayer life to improve. I’ve had some amazing encounters with God through prayer this year but I feel I’ve taken only the first step on this journey. I struggle with setting aside time for prayer (I gain to much of my energy from the flurry of activity in my life). It’s also difficult to get private time in a private place. Sometimes I think if I only had a prayer closet or if their were a house of prayer near where I live but I have a feeling that’s a lot like living under the delusion, if I only had a membership to the gym I would work out. There’s so much more to prayer than those externals. Any ideas…?

I’m sure there are many more things but I’m going to start with these. I value feedback from any of you who might happen to read these thoughts and I will do my best to offer feedback to anyone else who is willing to share their inner world with me.